Every coach, aspiring coach and quite frankly every human being that hasn’t been living under a rock for the past 20+ years, will of heard of Tony Robbins.
Now I could give you my definition of what a life coach is, or I could hand the mic over to the Godfather of coaching,
Mr Tony Robbins…
“The life coach definition is someone professionally trained to help you maximize your full potential and reach your desired results. They are like a supportive friend and a trusted adviser rolled into one. They’re someone who will push you to identify your goals, hold you accountable and provide encouragement throughout your journey to become a better version of yourself.”
Now you have heard it from the best, let me try and give you some insights into what it is I actually do, and how I help my clients, in the hope that you will have more clarity around whether coaching is for you.
My Life Coaching Niche
This is really just a fancy way of saying my ideal client.
Essentially my ideal client is me 3-5 years ago.
So how would I describe myself 3-5 years ago?
I had just entered a new relationship after spending almost 18 months single. Upon reflection I entered that relationship to try and prove to others that I was still worthy of being in a relationship and being loved. The majority of my life had been all about proving to others that I was good enough, and this relationship was no different.
It ended within less than a year and this really was my breakdown moment where I hit rock bottom.
You know when you are going through a breakup and you begin questioning everything?!
I was holding on to the ‘I love yous’ she said to me, and kept telling myself that she still loved me and we are meant to be together.
Finally when I was ready to accept that wasn’t the case I moved into;
Why was I not good enough?!
This is where I began beating myself up by saying ‘I could, I should, if only I…’ which wasn’t helpful but was necessary to help me transition into the next stage, which was;
Curiosity and responsibility.
This is the part where I was ready to change, and accept that I too had played a part in the breakdown of past relationships. I was no longer blaming them or myself, I was just ready to cut the crap, and start breaking the cycles, so I could learn to love myself and be able to co-create a healthy relationship.
So ‘you’ asked me who it is I help…
I help people that have got to a point in their lives where they know they need to change, start taking responsibility and begin looking inward.
I help people that are ready to do the work in order to be able to create the life and relationships they truly desire.
What does life coaching help them with?
So again I want to let you know the kind of issues I had.
So I was insecure, this led me to be jealous in relationships, because I would always tell myself ‘why would they be with me when they could be with someone much better?!’
I was an out and out people pleaser, because I just wanted to be liked by everyone, this came from a belief that I was unlikable, so I would always do whatever I thought I needed to do to be liked.
I was a cheat. Yep, I had cheated on my first girlfriend (we were together for 6 years and were engaged) because I held a belief that my sexuality (I’m not just talking preferred gender here I’m talking ALL things sexuality) was bad. This came from religious programming from childhood and is something I’m still learning to love fully,
Yep the work is always ongoing!
All of these things left me feeling like a bad person, I tried so hard to hide those ‘bad parts’ of myself from people, which is essentially me rejecting parts of myself because I believed they were unlovable.
So to try and sum it up…
I help people unlearn all their negative self beliefs that cause them to play small in life, and close off their heart through fear of being hurt and/or rejected, so they can start stepping into the most confident version of themselves, know what they want, and will NOT settle for any less.
How do I help you?
You know when you have thoughts and feelings that you want to talk about, but don’t feel like you have anyone around you that you can say it as it is to, because you are always worried about hurting their feelings, or being judged, or someone else finding out…
Well I give my clients that safe space to be able to say however they feel, and really open up about their true thoughts and feelings, so they can recognise that they aren’t bad, or crazy or any other stories they have believed about themselves, but simply they are human, and are worthy of all the love in the world.
I help my clients identify what it is they need from others, and themselves, and each week on our life coaching calls we create a plan for the week, that I hold them accountable to. This gives them the confidence, and the little nudge to take that action, or have that conversation they have been putting off but that they know will move them forward, and ultimately make them feel better in themselves day to day.
So my take on what a life coach is, and what I’m hugely passionate about, is helping people love themselves better, which first of all comes from having that one person in their lives that ALWAYS has their back so that over time they can learn to be that person for themselves.
I like to think Tony Robbins would agree 😉!
Are you ready to learn to start having your back by first having that 1 person by your side lovingly guiding and nudging you in the direction you know you need to go?
Comment below to book a FREE call.